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scrutney

how are you preparing for the rapture?

it's coming.


you've hemmed and hawed and put it off (like that spring cleaning you've been meaning to do since the turn of the century.)...so now, what the hell...you're off the hook...put the vacuum cleaner out on the the front lawn.
no one will care...no one will call the home owners association on you and if they do, you can tell them to blow it out their bosco.

the rapture's coming and not one moment too early as far as i'm concerned.

me?
the wife is out of town so i plan to drink like a fool and have risky sex with multiple partners.
and drugs, lots of drugs.
there are no urine tests in heaven and after tomorrow i won't have to worry about the ones that they won't be having at work because the world has come to an end.

i've cleaned out my savings account and blown it all on clown shoes for all my neighbors and their relatives.

and i kited a few checks too...i even paid off those legal bills for ed slavin.
i mean wtf?

so bum rejects...

how are you celebrating the rapture?
bieramar

Is this going to be a rolling blackout, beginning at noon zulu in London?

Or is it a simultaneous thingee around the globe?

I need to know as a group of local athiests, agnostics, buddhists, nudists and nativists are gathering at our local watering hole - the Lazy Lizard in San Antonito NM - then five minutes after the great vacuum are going to spread out in four directions retrieving keys from all the wrecked vehicles of the enraptured which have run off the roads.  

Then we're going to have access to party houses for years.
jasmine

bieramar wrote:
Is this going to be a rolling blackout, beginning at noon zulu in London?

Or is it a simultaneous thingee around the globe?

I need to know as a group of local athiests, agnostics, buddhists, nudists and nativists are gathering at our local watering hole - the Lazy Lizard in San Antonito NM - then five minutes after the great vacuum are going to spread out in four directions retrieving keys from all the wrecked vehicles of the enraptured which have run off the roads.  

Then we're going to have access to party houses for years.


Well I did have other plans, but after reading B's post, I am going to NM.
coebul

I'll make sure to fill the gas tank this evening.
puc reducks

Listening to Bob Dylan until my ears bleed.
coebul

Yuck!
scrutney

puc reducks wrote:
Listening to Bob Dylan until my ears bleed.


my wife would say that that's cause and effect.

she hates dylan.
she says that his singing sounds like a man being attacked by bees while using the outhouse after a mexican dinner.

obviously, we don't agree.
a lady i work with had a similar opinion...but after working with me for 9 years and hearing dylan (i had to listen to billy joel to barter for a dylan album...talk about penance)...she asked me this week to play that 'shelter' song...an electric version of "shelter from the storm" performed by the rolling thunder revue 1976...from the less than awesome "hard rain" album.

so i played the original version from 75's blood on the tracks.

she's hooked.
puc reducks

coebul wrote:
Yuck!


What yuck???

Bob Dylan?

Or bleeding ears?

You're such an onery polecat!   Laughing
puc reducks

scrutney wrote:
puc reducks wrote:
Listening to Bob Dylan until my ears bleed.


my wife would say that that's cause and effect.

she hates dylan.
she says that his singing sounds like a man being attacked by bees while using the outhouse after a mexican dinner.

obviously, we don't agree.
a lady i work with had a similar opinion...but after working with me for 9 years and hearing dylan (i had to listen to billy joel to barter for a dylan album...talk about penance)...she asked me this week to play that 'shelter' song...an electric version of "shelter from the storm" performed by the rolling thunder revue 1976...from the less than awesome "hard rain" album.

so i played the original version from 75's blood on the tracks.

she's hooked.


Yeah, I just set these things up for you, Scrutney!   Laughing

Dear Lord, Billy Joel???   Shocked

I love the electric versionn of "Shelter from the Storm" by TRTR!

A convert!  Way cool!

(Ai yi yi, caramba re the bees stinging in the outhouse after Mexican dins... that's some image!)
coebul

What ever! Dylan is ok in drips and drabs but not a steady diet.   You want your ears to bleed wait until tomorrow all the air sucked off the planet oughta take care of that....

Hell do what cha like I won't be here.    Wink
puc reducks

coebul wrote:
What ever! Dylan is ok in drips and drabs but not a steady diet.   You want your ears to bleed wait until tomorrow all the air sucked off the planet oughta take care of that....

Hell do what cha like I won't be here.    Wink


Yeah, like any of us are gonna get offa this mortal coil that easily.   Rolling Eyes
coebul

LOL
scrutney

coe wrote:
What ever! Dylan is ok in drips and drabs but not a steady diet.


a steady diet of dylan feeds the head along with the soul.

puc wrote:
Dear Lord, Billy Joel???


hey, billy joel's got his place...a piano bar in long island springs to mind.

"the" album of 1980 at virginia wesleyan college was..."glass houses"
from the first time i heard the needle drop, i hated that hunk of cheese....bj trying (and failing) to be hip, trendy and new wavy.

i've never forgiven him for that abomination or his subsequent trips to the butcher shop.

he is flies in zoup.

edited to add:

back on topic

i'm on my 17th bottle of cabenet, knee deep in the boudoirs of several ladies of negotiable affection, alternately huffing pure oxygen and amyl nitrate and popping nitro glycerine tablets like so many pez.

viva armageddon.


puc reducks

scrutney wrote:
coe wrote:
What ever! Dylan is ok in drips and drabs but not a steady diet.


a steady diet of dylan feeds the head along with the soul.

puc wrote:
Dear Lord, Billy Joel???


[color=blue]hey, billy joel's got his place...a piano bar in long island springs to mind.

"the" album of 1980 at virginia wesleyan college was..."glass houses"
from the first time i heard the needle drop, i hated that hunk of cheese....bj trying (and failing) to be hip, trendy and new wavy.

i've never forgiven him for that abomination or his subsequent trips to the butcher shop.

he is flies in zoup.[/color]
 LOL!!!



One pilll makes you larger, and one pill makes you small
But the one that mother??? gives you, won't do anything at all...

Go ask Alice...When she's ten feet talll

Feee your head.... Feed your head....

Just having a Grace Slick flashback.

~~~~~

Well, yeah, I don't hate-hate Billy Joel.  I always get choked up at "Mr. Bojangles" because of his dog.

Largely, though, I avoided him.  I can't recall the 1980s.  Too stoned/peyoted too much and always out of radio wave distance, trekking for archaeological sites along the Colorado Plateau.  No place to plug in the radio had I had one in my backpack.
scrutney

ya know, it's funny puc.
i never had much use for the airplane until a couple of years ago...i went on a binge and bought all the "good" jeffair albums...from surrealistic pillow up to the 2nd starship album "dragonfly."

holy crap, what a body of work.
they were doing things with rock and roll that no one has come even close to touching.

no one has even tried.

dual male/female vocals(doing 20 different things at once)...electric fiddles...science fiction mini operas.

there was so much going on in their music at any given time that it took 20 spins before you caught a fraction of it.

no...they weren't the beatles, the who, the stones or dylan.

they were something much stranger.

they were salvador dali in a peter max world.

edited to add:
never heard billy's version of bojangles.

the versions i'm familiar with are from the nitty gritty dirt band and sammy davis jr's...although i'm partial to the dirt band's version, sammy did an incredible cover with his derby (shoved down over his eyebrows) and some cool footwork for punctuation...a true homage to bill "bojangles" robinson.

if, on the off chance, you're not familiar with the work of bojangles...check out (and you should be able to find it on you tube) an amazing duet he did with shirley temple...yes...that shirley temple.

amazing stuff.

back on topic...11 sailors at the house.
the bong has melted.
on the third can of crisco.

i think i'm engaged.
scrutney

conga, conga, con-ga.
conga, conga, con-ga.
conga, conga, con-ga.
conga, conga, con-ga.
boom shaka-laka-laka-laka.
boom shaka-laka-laka-laka.
and if we try really hard, i think we can make it rain.
whoooooa-ooooooh-ooooooh-oh-ohhhhh.
yeah yeah yeah yeah.

whoooooa-ooooooh-ooooooh-oh-ohhhhh.
yeah yeah yeah yeah.
scrutney

hark.
hank hardoooza.
harponezbit.
sqautront and spafoon.
resquile letkovick yessir, plesquit.
yooooobetcha.
jasmine

coebul wrote:
What ever! Dylan is ok in drips and drabs but not a steady diet.   You want your ears to bleed wait until tomorrow all the air sucked off the planet oughta take care of that....

Hell do what cha like I won't be here.    Wink


I am still here, how about the rest of you?  I guess only the evil ones are left, the we are going to go suffer, by listening to Joan Rivers, until "yes", your ears bleed and your brain melts.
jasmine

scrutney wrote:
conga, conga, con-ga.
conga, conga, con-ga.
conga, conga, con-ga.
conga, conga, con-ga.
boom shaka-laka-laka-laka.
boom shaka-laka-laka-laka.
and if we try really hard, i think we can make it rain.
whoooooa-ooooooh-ooooooh-oh-ohhhhh.
yeah yeah yeah yeah.

whoooooa-ooooooh-ooooooh-oh-ohhhhh.
yeah yeah yeah yeah.


After reading that, I welcome someone to come and get me.   Shocked
Phred

Funny thread ... luvit.

I had forgotten about it until seeing this thread.  I'm boring, just gonna head on down to the "V" and drink myself into oblivion ... hey, nothing new there.

But, if they're wrong all I'll have is a hangover and I can still visit Scrutney in jail ... unless a jealous husband or his wife gets to him first.
Dunrobin

Card carrying heathen here - making plans now for Sunday at the beach!
bieramar

scrutney's party blog updates bring to mind a month I spent in Beirut before "the troubles" began -- without the excuse of an imminent worldwide rapture or armegeddon.  Just our spook motto of "eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow we may die."

Gotta say I admire your stamina, and early commencement, scrutney.

Our collective party on the mountain begins at noon your time with Bloody Beer Marys at (I can't even believe I'm going to be a part of this) an authentic "garage sale" - with the gang on lawn chairs watching the prospective buyers rummage.  My guess is that half of them will stay.  No open container law!
coebul

jasmine wrote:

I am still here, how about the rest of you?  I guess only the evil ones are left, the we are going to go suffer, by listening to Joan Rivers, until "yes", your ears bleed and your brain melts.


Notice found on the Coebul's family farm.

Out to Lunch!
puc reducks

Phred wrote:
Funny thread ... luvit.

I had forgotten about it until seeing this thread.  I'm boring, just gonna head on down to the "V" and drink myself into oblivion ... hey, nothing new there.

But, if they're wrong all I'll have is a hangover and I can still visit Scrutney in jail ... unless a jealous husband or his wife gets to him first.


LOL!

My $$$s on the jealoous wife!  Scrut's too fast; hel'll out-run and out-maneuver the jealous husbands.  But his wife.  Have you read what she said about Bob Dylan's voice?  Shocked   No, ol' Scrut's in for it... big time... if there is no beaming up into Heaven in about 17 minutes.   Laughing
puc reducks

coebul wrote:

Notice found on the Coebul's family farm.

Out to Lunch!


Coe,
Thnat's what I say about you all the time!!!   Laughing  Cool  Wink
coebul

Returned from the Rapture to check email and postings on Bumrejects.

Leaving note jump in the water's fine.
jasmine

Dunrobin wrote:
Card carrying heathen here - making plans now for Sunday at the beach!


Hi Dun, glad to be in touch again.  I am going to leave a pair of pants, t-shirt, underwear and sandals out on my front lawn and give my neighbors something to think about
coebul

jasmine wrote:
Dunrobin wrote:
Card carrying heathen here - making plans now for Sunday at the beach!


Hi Dun, glad to be in touch again.  I am going to leave a pair of pants, t-shirt, underwear and sandals out on my front lawn and give my neighbors something to think about


Gawd I wish I had thought of that!  Funny!
jasmine

coebul wrote:
Returned from the Rapture to check email and postings on Bumrejects.

Leaving note jump in the water's fine.


I thought the Rapture was at 6:00, where the hell have you been?
puc reducks

scrutney wrote:
ya know, it's funny puc.
i never had much use for the airplane until a couple of years ago...i went on a binge and bought all the "good" jeffair albums...from surrealistic pillow up to the 2nd starship album "dragonfly."

holy crap, what a body of work.
they were doing things with rock and roll that no one has come even close to touching.

no one has even tried.

dual male/female vocals(doing 20 different things at once)...electric fiddles...science fiction mini operas.

there was so much going on in their music at any given time that it took 20 spins before you caught a fraction of it.

no...they weren't the beatles, the who, the stones or dylan.

they were something much stranger.

they were salvador dali in a peter max world.

edited to add:
never heard billy's version of bojangles.

the versions i'm familiar with are from the nitty gritty dirt band and sammy davis jr's...although i'm partial to the dirt band's version, sammy did an incredible cover with his derby (shoved down over his eyebrows) and some cool footwork for punctuation...a true homage to bill "bojangles" robinson.

if, on the off chance, you're not familiar with the work of bojangles...check out (and you should be able to find it on you tube) an amazing duet he did with shirley temple...yes...that shirley temple.

amazing stuff.

back on topic...11 sailors at the house.
the bong has melted.
on the third can of crisco.

i think i'm engaged.


Scrut,
There is much to be said for listening to music from that era NOW!  Unless there was a profoundly distinct melody ("Feed your head"), it was all psychedelic light shows, colors, and "sound" to me.  Music?  Not that I remember...

Always fascinating to read your perspectives on any music of any era.

West Coast stuff was "stranger."  But, then, that's always been true of the West Coast.  (Evidence, you ask?  Where does Coebul live?  I rest my case.  Laughing )

I'm gonna have to listen to Jefferson Airplane again.

Youbetcha! Watched Shirley Temple flicks from an early age. My mother used to see her films and loved them, so whenever they came on, we watched together.  I loved Shirley and any of the dancers (remember a tall, loose, and lanky Buddy Ebsen???) dance up and down stairs and tapping riffs at each other.  

Remember that Sammy Davis Jr. album--just as you describe--and the schmoozy, boozy edge he put to the song.  When he was on top, he was some kinda dancer.

Nitty Gritty Dirt Band--recall their version of "Mr. Bo Jangles."  Can you say,
"M-e-l-l-o-w"?  Are they the same group who did "Mr. Tambourine Man" and put me to sleep???

~~~~~~~~~~

Hope you cleaned up the house after your orgy.

You got 1-1/2 minutes!
coebul

jasmine wrote:
coebul wrote:
Returned from the Rapture to check email and postings on Bumrejects.

Leaving note jump in the water's fine.


I thought the Rapture was at 6:00, where the hell have you been?
GMT.  I am never late to an event.  This is the pre event party.
scrutney

Quote:
Notice found on the Coebul's family farm.
Out to Lunch!


i ain't gonna work on coebul's farm, no more.
no, i ain't gonna work on coebul's farm, no more.
i wake up in the morning
and the rapture ain't done rapt.
the suspicion's creeping up on me,
that the reverend's full of crap.
and there's strumpets loudly banging on my door.
no i ain't gonna work on coebul's farm no more.


logically the next verse would be:

i ain't gonna work for coebul's brother no more.

whoa....
head rush.


Quote:
Hope you cleaned up the house after your orgy.


i'm still trying to get the reptiles off the walls.

and they're pulsing.
Mac IX

I'm too damn close to it anyway.  Doesn't make a hell of a lot of difference either way!
puc reducks

Scrutney wrote:

"i'm still trying to get the reptiles off the walls."


Gah.  I hate when that happens.
bieramar

Dadgummit!  

And I didn't believe the Rapture would come last night!

But this morning there are empty lady's clothes strewn from my living room to my bedroom.

Q.E.D.
scrutney

bieramar wrote:
Dadgummit!  

And I didn't believe the Rapture would come last night!



word round the heavenly powder room is that the rapture was indeed last night and no one made the cut.
jasmine

bieramar wrote:
Dadgummit!  

And I didn't believe the Rapture would come last night!

But this morning there are empty lady's clothes strewn from my living room to my bedroom.

Q.E.D.


Damn, I am not touching that one.  Yes, I'm still here too.  Oh well,
bieramar

The Rapture date has been re-calculated and rescheduled for Oct. 21 this fall.
puc reducks

bieramar wrote:
The Rapture date has been re-calculated and rescheduled for Oct. 21 this fall.


Wondering what significance the 21st holds for Camping?

Just a little less than 5 months to prepare.  Whew!
auntmartymoo

Rumors of my transportation via rapture...

have been greatly exaggerated.
auntmartymoo

Couldn't find a better place for this Gun stuff, so I thought I'd revive this fabulous thread.

Check out the increase amongst the ladies:



Link to article: "Self-Reported Gun Ownership in U.S. Is Highest Since 1993"
http://www.gallup.com/poll/150353...d-Gun-Ownership-Highest-1993.aspx
bieramar

With only a couple of exceptions, both in Florida and in New Mexico every woman I've known well carries a handgun - a much higher percentage than the national average - but I realize that's a combination of my non-urban life style, and the personalities and philosophies of the women and of myself, and our mutual likes and habits.

Here in the high plains wilderness of New Mexico with big cats and bears, 100% of men and women hiking parties have at least one weapon along.  Being an open carry state - except on posted private property (e.g., one tavern I frequent is posted) - of course is also a factor.
auntmartymoo

haha  That's interesting.  Is it possible that you're the reason all the women in your life carry handguns?  Wink

Most of my (girl) friends are far more liberal than I...and I can't think of a single one who owns, let alone carries, a handgun!

In fact, of all the women in my gigantic extended family...I'm probably the only one with a gun in either the nightstand or in the glove box.

But I see your point about "setting" having something to do with the high ratio in your life.  If my women friends lived in the wilderness rather than the burbs, perhaps more of them would carry handguns, too!
coebul

bieramar wrote:
With only a couple of exceptions, both in Florida and in New Mexico every woman I've known well carries a handgun - a much higher percentage than the national average - but I realize that's a combination of my non-urban life style, and the personalities and philosophies of the women and of myself, and our mutual likes and habits.
Or they are just terrified of you!
bieramar

And sometimes bigger is better!
auntmartymoo

But then ego isn't everything.



Zing!





Wink  Wink  Wink
bieramar

Ego? ... and the size of handguns?
coebul

bieramar wrote:
And sometimes bigger is better!
Not if your shooting blanks.

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